Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD and part of this wording in the last few months has been kinda on my mind.
Note: this is my thoughts from personal experience. This isn't the Post Traumatic Stress Olympics and medals given out to those whose PTSI cause is worst.
While I am no medical expert calling it a disorder has been kind of bugging me when I talk about it. A big part of this change is the cause of my second case of PTSD which was caused by another person who caused me severe physical harm and leaving to die at the side of a Kingston street.
Add to this some comments made over the last few years by veteran I met who refer it to an injury instead of a disorder. Also seen in some articles out of the US where they call it Post Traumatic Stress as they don't view it as a disorder.
See when I hear someone call a mental illness a disorder I think of something like ADD. Something not caused by others. It is an illness caused by other factors not by a human causing another human harm unlike ADD. As well as having been through being told had ADD as a child and what have learned since I feel that PTSI is not even close to a disorder. Really ADD is a description of behaviours in a individual. No actual injury occurred at least in my experience.
The more I think about calling PTS a disorder is it makes it far to easy to not consider that injury takes many forms and not just the kind we can see. It makes it easy to dismiss the fact that the person with PTS is suffering in some form of pain. And completely removes any holding another person for the harm they cause another like say hitting a person with a car and leaving them to die. By not acknowledging that it is in fact an injury it makes it easy to dismiss the person injured with PTS to consider it an injury and further isolates them.
Reality is that PTSI is an injury of the human brain caused by trauma caused by others or a major event. The injury to the brain causes things to change. Unfortunately one cannot walk into an ER and point at a certain part of your head and say "I am injured here. This is the spot" and the medical staff can easily see it and go ok there it is. Unlike a swollen shut eye, knee brace, huge bruises, and other obvious physical signs of harm it cannot be seen. It is invisible. So it at least from my observation makes it easier to say it is a disorder and here is some meds.
This makes it worse for the victim of harm caused by others. With a swollen shut eye and huge bruises or broken bones for example one can watch it change and heal over time. This to me is a huge factor as while you have had a physical injury you can watch it get better. With PTSI one cannot watch it slowly heal and get better Which makes it worse as not only can you not see the injury but don't see it get better over time in the mirror. To me this is frustrating as have noticed with injuries that are physical and can be seen people don't dismiss it as easily because to them it is an actual injury in their minds. While anything injuring the brain is blown off as no big deal as a disorder like ADD and meds will cure it all.
The image of the helmet from the incident that gave me PTS makes me consider even more that it is an injury. While I can consider it a win looking at a broken in half helmet that there was no broken skull or anything like that. I know that there has been other injury to my brain as reality is that my brain was bounced around in my skull. Sadly to often it has been commented your helmet took the blow so your head is ok.
I wish it was that simple. Reality is for me my brain was injured and while the other injuries to back, shoulders, neck, and other locations have healed or are being worked on. And is easy to show physio and surgeons the problems. The injury to my brain is harder as there is nothing like that can do to show. And it makes it harder to get others to get that it is an injury. One that has changed my life forever and everyday is going to be different depending on so many factors. And changes many others who get a PTS Injury as well in their own ways as it effects each person differently.
And like any injury especially if severe enough there is long term effects which will vary individually. As well as how it is dealt with and managed is very individual. Some climb mountains and others run ultra marathons to manage the effects of the injury.
For me the primary management tool is riding mountain bikes in the woods as well as some weight training. And in the last 2 years have spent a bit more effort as well going to new areas to ride and some challenges kind of accidently came up with. One thing that has been added is the occasional short hiking trip with a friend . Though the other side of managing my PTSI has been learning things like how long can be in a store or near crowds.
Again am not a medical expert nor is this everyone’s else’s experience of living with PTSI. But why from now on will be referring to it as an Injury. That am still figuring out the long term effects of this injury.
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